School Update

Hey Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Rebel Yell by Billy Idol.

Just a quick little sentence about that song, I love it. It pretty much is awesome.

I am no longer in my evolution class with Twin. I dropped it in favor of an education class. It works better for me this way. It is definitely a better class for me in the long run. Twin and I had some small issues that stemmed from some miscommunication. I am just not a person who likes to deal with drama and the such, so I opted not to even have a small chance of having an issue in class. I take my schooling very seriously and I don't need anything to obstruct from me getting the best education possible. Just an update.

:)

Soul

College

Hey Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Make me Believe by Angel Taylor.

College is coming up in a couple weeks, 20 days exactly. It is such a mind trip when I think about it. College is something I have been thinking about since my freshmen year of high school. Now it is here. I am so excited about it. I cannot wait to get into classes that are harder and be able to discuss things to a great extent. I am excited about the longer class periods even! I am taking a class with Twin even! Which I am very happy about. I will be going to classes Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday. I am happy about the long weekend, and the midweek break.

I am taking a literature class on gender and sexuality that I am sooooo excited about. The course description is "This section will explore how definitions of gender and sexuality affect our lives, choices and identities in powerful ways. We will read a variety of women's and men's viewpoints and will analyze, research and write essays on topics such as advertising, pornography, sports and work." I am looking to dive right in. I know that I will be able to offer a great deal to the class. I am looking to incorporate my own knowledge into the subject, but am also looking forward to adding to my knowledge. Not to mention it is a class in my strong suit, English.

Then I am taking an evolution class that Twin is enrolled in as well. It satisfies a requirement and it is a class with Twin, so I am excited. If Twin wasn't taking this, then I don't think I would have taken it my first semester, but it something that sounds interesting.

I also have a speech class, which I am thrilled about. I need to remember to keep my excitement to a minimum the first day at least. My oral communication skills are definitely up to par, so I don't think I will have a problem in this class. My speech class in high school was amazing, and I was one of three people to walk out of the class with an A. I am confident in the arena. Also, so far this is one of the only classes that has a lot of seats open [9]. I hope it stays that way. Speech classes are always better with a smaller number of people.

Then I have an Early Western Civilization class. I am a bit wary about this one. I know that I will need to study for this class and really pay attention. I know that with the amount of time that the class covers and the time we have to cover it... *geesh* I think this will be an interesting, but time consuming class. Although this class only has 13 students enrolled right now, I hope it stays near that number, I like the more personal classes and I would love it for this subject.

I have an Intro to Psych class, which I am really only taking so I can take abnormal psych and adolescent psych. I have already taken an intro to psych class in high school. So this should be relatively easy. Another reason I say that is because Twin took the class and I remember her talking about it and knowing A LOT of what she was talking about.

Then, the class I'm enrolled in, is Film and Society. I don't really know what this class will involve, but it sounds cool. So I have an open mind as to what to expect.

That's what my life is going to be like soon. I am very excited.

:)

Soul

Perfect for me.

Hi Everyone.

I'm currently listening to We Made You by Eminem.

Alright, soooo sorry about the lapse in blogging again. I've just been doing so much online these days. Oh, and I am finally graduated from high school!!!

Alright, but I just got a package... Sky sent me a shirt of his in the mail. I was so excited to get it. I still am not down from the excitement of opening the package. He is truly the perfect guy (for me). I have told him that he is perfect in the past, but he always reminds me that he is human. To which I say that I am human too and we all have our flaws and such. But the thing is, he is perfect for me.

So I opened my package and right on top of the shirt was a sticky note. :) It made me smile. My heart fills every time I hear/read that he loves me. I don't know how I got so lucky, but I really am the luckiest girl. Because I truly think I found the person who I can grow old with. He is the greatest guy I have ever met.

I am crossing my fingers and waiting for this magical dream job to open up for him here. I want him to get a job tomorrow! I am a good girl though, waiting, and loving.

<3

Soul

Get your booty into gear!

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Poker Face by Lady GaGa.

Alrighty, once again, it's been awhile. That's what my title is about, getting my butt into gear and keeping this up. School has been school though, not too much interesting going on there. Busy but boring.

What is really interesting is this new guy... Hmmm what to name him... SILVER!!! Okay, so Silver and I met a couple years ago. We lost touch for a while, but we are back in contact. Talking to him, it feels like I've known him my whole life. I'm glad we started talking again. He's a really chill guy who is just plainly amazing. We have so much in common and really click. He's a good friend to have reconnected with.

I think that's it. Oh, Twin and I are having a blast together. We have been hanging out a lot recently. She is AMAZING!!!! Woo!!!

<3

Soul

Everybody Have Fun...

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to I'm not that Girl from the musical Wicked.

So, my 18th birthday is coming up really soon. I am very excited about it. There is a local 18+ store, a bit on the naughty side if you know what I mean, and my friends and I are going there. It will be Twin, Mediterranean, Platinum (another really close friend of mine), and Manhattan. The only thing is that Manhattan is not 18. So I feel sort of bad because she isn't going to be able to come to that part of the celebration. When I brought it up to her she said that it was better because she thinks it's stupid and she wouldn't want to be seen there. I mean, to each their own, but that sort of hurt. I mean, we are going there to have a good laugh, nothing weird.

Oh, but afterwards I am going to a semi-local video store that has a 18+ section and we are getting some "sensitive materials". I am looking forward to it. I think it will be really funny and I think it'll be a good time overall.

Enough about that. I know that I haven't written about my 'book' in a while. I have started working on it again. Twin is a writer as well and she was talking to me about writing some stuff out of order and since I don't know how to connect the part I'm on now with where I want it to go, I am writing the future scene and going back to connect later. I hope all works out. I am having Twin read part of it tomorrow. I am really nervous because she will be the first person to read it. AHHHH! So, yeah, that's my life.

Oh, wait, River and Ginger are amazing. I'll tackle them one at a time. (Oh and I need to talk about Noodles too!) So River is amazingly funny. I feel like he is one of the most brilliant men I have ever met. He seems to have a neverending wealth of knowledge. I find myself wanting to talk to him all the time because I feel like he inspires me not only to be a better student but also to incorporate my intelligence into everyday conversations. However I feel like a fool because I feel like there is always something I say that makes me feel like an idiot.

Ginger has been having a hard time with our class. It's not his fault, the class is out of control. He is really doing his best and he is an amazing teacher. (oh, and not that I was looking but he has a really great butt as well) He is moving seats tomorrow and I have a thing about sitting in the front of the classroom so I waited after class to talk to him. He seemed so dejected, it broke my heart. I asked him to try and take into consideration that I like sitting in the front and he said that he could do that. He then proceeded to tell me how much he appreciates me in that class. I thought it was really sweet because it's stuff like that keeps me behaving. He's a great guy and I feel bad that the class is so awful.

Okay, now, since I was just talking about moving seats... Noodles moved our seats and so now I'm not sitting next to Puck anymore! I'm definitely sad. Puck and I talked and he is sooo sweet. Now I won't be able to talk to him as much... =( Silly Noodles...

=)

Soul

Ginger with some WAS-AAAAA-BEEEEEEE!

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Gone Forever by Three Days Grace.

Instead of lamenting about my sucky life right now, I am going to talk about something I think is really cool. So, Friday I went to talk to Ginger after class. Considering we both have a free period it works out really nicely. I wanted to take the time to tell him that I really enjoy his class and the material that we are covering.

So I tell him this and how excited I am about the class. He goes on to tell me how flattered he is and how sorry he is to ME. I was so surprised. He said that he felt bad because he knows that the class is rude and disrespectful. He was telling me that I was one of two students who he feels are taking the class for the right reasons. (The rest are taking it as a blowoff) I thought the whole conversation we had was really cool.

I thought it was nice to see a teacher coming to realize how he needs to control a class. So many teachers these days just let kids get away with way too much.

=)

Soul

My spirals

Hi Everyone!

I’m currently listening to This is Why I’m Hot by Mims.

My life has been a spiraling craze since school started. As much as I want to write here every night it seems more and more impossible as the days go on. I didn’t even do my August 50, sorry to those of you who might have been looking for it. I am going to try and put out two in September, but who knows, it is quite time consuming.

College is looming on the horizons, coming closer and closer, mostly just freaking me out. I need to ask my teachers for recommendations and find out all the necessary information. Most importantly though is sleep.

I have not been getting a lot of sleep lately. Quite frankly, it is affecting me. I hate it. So I go to bed earlier and earlier. At least I try to.

=O (yawning)

Soul

School's Back

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Daughter to Father by Lindsey Lohan.

So, school has started and back to the grindstone once again. I sort of just want to talk about my life events right now.

First period I have AP English IV. The teacher, I shall call him River. Well, River is what every teacher should be like. He is so smart and really gets me excited for class and learning, well, him and the material. This one guy who I despise is in the class, but so is one of my really good friends. So I guess it's a bit of a give and take situation.

Second period is my history class. The teacher is constantly cracking jokes and just being nice. I was really looking forward to this class because there are so many people who I don't actually know, but today we worked in groups and of course the teacher paired me up with three girls I knew. I was sort of frustrated, and I think I took it out on them. Whoops. Well, they were being apathetic, and I hate that.

Third period I have NOTHING. It is a nice break in my day. I have definitely been taking advantage of it.

Fourth period is my AP french class. The teacher I shall call Noodles. Well, Noodles is soooo nice. I had her my fresh and soph year, so we have a great rapport. Also, a nice boy is in my class (I am naming him Puck). So Puck sits close to me and he is really funny and super nice. I hear from my sources (his ex) that he is like my ex, a good friend and a bad boyfriend. Oh well, it's always nice to have a bit of eye candy.

Fifth period I have astronomy. I am really interested in this class. I will probably try and take another course in college. However, because it is a low level elective many students in it look at it as a blowoff class and just talk and disrespect the teacher. (I'm calling the teacher Ginger). I am probably one of three people who are respectful. I don't like that. But I love the class.

Sixth is nothing again.

Seventh is my computer programming class. I am the ONLY girl. UGH! I only know one boy in there, luckily he is really nice and we're friends.

Eighth I have River again as my teacher. I love this class, it is a class that analyzes media. I am loving it already, right now we are thinking about music and I have to pick five significant songs. It has turned out to be quite difficult to choose five.

Then last is gym. uggh, don't even make me talk about this.

=)

Soul

Good old days?

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Size Matters by Joe Nichols.

I moved the summer before 8th grade. There were a couple reasons but one of them was my history at my old school. I have worked very hard to overcome difficulties in my life and transform it to what it is today. The past couple of weeks I have felt my precious life that I have built for myself being threatened.

I wasn't always the nicest person. Quite to the contrary, I was a mean little girl. I don't blame anyone but myself for my behavior, but I do think my surroundings called upon my actions. Growing up heavy is never easy. It is hard for me to even talk about because I know that it doesn't stop, the pain that I have buried deep won't stop hurting just because I'm not in the situation anymore.

I started gaining weight in first grade/second grade. Third grade was really bad, I was double the weight I should have been and kids were getting mean. So I cried at home until I realized I needed to grow some thick skin. I admit, I was one of those people who was "cool" because people were afraid of me. People were only my friend because they knew I would create shit for them if they were mean to me. That didn't last very long though, the few friends I did have distanced themselves from me.

Not to mention with my test scores and intelligence my school wanted to put me in an accelerated program, my mom did not want this though. She said that I should make friends with a bunch of kids instead of a select few. However the kids in my class didn't like me because I was done with worksheets that took them twenty minutes in three. The kids who were in the accelerated program didn't like me because they didn't think I belonged with them.

My bratty and outright mean attitude only got me in trouble and put distance between me and everyone else. I couldn't fit in with the advance crowd, even when my mom finally gave in to the accelerated program. So, when the option was move to a different district or me probably committing suicide within two years, we moved.

We didn't move too far away, only nine miles. But the distance is really a world apart. My old neighborhood had many more impoverished where as my new neighborhood has an average income level higher than Orange County, California. (You know, OC, the county with all the reality shows about spoiled little rich kids?) I changed my attitude and found people who care about me.

Well, Manhattan and one of my other friends work together at a local hot spot, where two people from my old school just started working. I usually go there often enough to know everyone who works there and keep up on their work gossip, however since these two girls have started working I haven't gone there once. I am so afraid that these two girls will invade my precious life by telling people what I used to be like. I have changed, I am not that girl anymore. However, I am a teenager and the past is just as much a part of the present as the present is. Judgments will be made. So I keep my distance.

I was working out today with my personal trainer. Laughing and talking as we walked through the free weight area when my breath got caught in my throat. Standing over by the bench press was the boy. You girls know who I'm talking about, the boy who caught your eye through out elementary school. He was standing right there, no more than seven feet away from me. I couldn't breathe, not because any feelings came back, but because this was MY GYM! Why can't they all just leave me alone? The scariest thing? The boy was wearing a school spirit shirt FROM MY HIGH SCHOOL! I am so frightened... what if he comes to my school next year? I just want them all to stay in their own town. I'll stay in mine...

= (

Soul

Diet Coke and Homemade Tacos!

Hi Everyone!

I'm Currently Listening to Hot in Herre by Nelly


Okay, now to something that literally just happened, breaking news... I feel like such an idiot! Twin just called me to say when she was coming into work, and I feel like such an idiot! Well, here's the (paraphrased) convo...
Me: Hey!
Twin: Hey are you at work?
Me: Yeah, I'm in
Twin: Oh well my little brother has a friend over and they want me to make something for them
Me: you want me to come over? (background info- Twin lives right near our place of employment)
Twin: Um, if you want to
Me: (feeling like an idiot already because I just invited myself over and I hate that) oh no no no, I have stuff to eat, I'll see you when you get here.

UGH! I hate myself! I feel like a complete idiot. Blah!

Other than that though I had an amazing day. It was my last day as a junior and I am doing terrifically! I can't believe I am a senior. It is such a crazy thing to think that I have already gone through three years of high school. It feels like it just started yesterday and at the same time it feels like I've been there forever. I'll write more about that within the next two days.

Thanks for taking this crazy life journey with me!

= )

Soul

Crazy Life

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Just a Little Bit by 50 Cent

I have a million and a half things to do tonight. I need to write two essays for english and compile a huge list of names for my history class. Not to mention I wanted to watch all of season six of Sex and the City before Sunday. I haven't started yet. = )

I also need to watch Lost! I am beyond excited. I get to see Sawyer. I LOVE Josh Holloway/Sawyer. I have a strange attraction to "bad boys" I think it's because I have an incessant need to fix things. I think that they will "change". Also, I like to think the best of everyone so I always like to think there is something soft and gooey beneath.


= )

Soul

My dearly beloved friends

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Last Name by Carrie Underwood.

Today was a really hard day for me to get through at school. I am a junior and some of my closest friends are seniors. Today was the last day of school for the seniors. I found myself wanting to cry so many times. They were all happy because they are done with high school and they still have to go through the actual grad ceremony and everything. I on the other hand had the sad realization that I was seeing some of these people of the last time.

While I will still see my friends over the summer and throughout my life, there are the random people who you see in the hallways and sit next to you in chem who I most likely won't see again. It is a sad sad thing to realize. It's even hard for me to type this out because it brings up so many emotions. I'm not a highly emotional person, but today really got to me. I don't even want to think of the last time I see each of my friends before college, it might just break me.

Good news though, one of my near dear friends, I shall call her Mediterranean, got her yearbook today and I was able to sign it. Hmmm, actually that applies to both of the real life friends who read this. So, let's talk about Mediterranean, and her great impact on my life. Actually, I have talked about her in a previous post, don't ask which one, because I will go back and find it if you do.

Mediterranean has inspired me to become a better me. She holds her head up high and doesn't care what other people think of her. While I hold my head up high and pretend to not care, I secret listen and analyze the moment I'm alone. I'd like to stop doing that. I think that seeing how strong of a person she is helps me stop caring about what people say. It sounds mighty trivial, but she is the kindest person. She took a lot of the courses I am, a year earlier but took them none-the-less. She has given me multiple things to help me prepare for next year and for that I can never show enough gratitude. She is a genuinely good human being.

Hmmm, it seems like I enjoy coming up with code names that begin with the letter "M".

=)

Soul

Tired self...

Hi Everyone!

I’m currently listening to Fuck Ya Man by Tila Tequila

I have been studying for my AP English test like no other. It’s actually quite ridiculous and tiring. So my mind has been focused on hyperboles and syllogisms. So I have no life, I have come to terms with that a long time ago. = )

American Idol is on tonight and I feel like it is sort of useless for me to even watch it because the Davids will go on to next week. I will watch it though. Because I like the show. I’m just really tired and want to go to sleep.

It’s funny because I find myself wanting to sleep more and more these days. Sort of funny. Not to mention I need to go to school early tomorrow and support one of my friends. Part of me is sour about it because she doesn’t really support me. I go out of my way for my friends, so I will be there.

Well, maybe I’ll go eat some dinner then go to bed.

= 0 (yawning)

Soul

Warm Fuzzy Feelings

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Honey by Bonnie McKee!

So I love my life. I had a semi day off. I had stuff to do, lots of stuff, but I did not have the usual mundane-ness of school. I have been busy gathering information on all the lovely schools I want to (and don't want to) go to. It was definitely a surprising process in which I learned a lot. AUQUEL! (sorry, french lesson coming out in the blog)... All in all the information gathering was quite useful.

Well, on the topic of graduation and college and such... I am currently a junior (as I believe I previously stated) who has a lot of senior friends. Everyone says that the year you graduate is really difficult with friends leaving and everyone departing for new parts of their lives, but I think this year will be more difficult for me. Besides maybe four juniors the majority of my friends are seniors.

Onto Blogging news though. I apparently have one fan so far, http://trissteh.blogspot.com/ . Which gets me excited. I am happy to say though that I really enjoy her writing as well. I guess likes attract (opposing the popular saying). She has four separate blogs, but the one I gave you the link to has the most posts and in my opinion the most inspired ones as well. I'm glad I like the blog.

I guess that's about it. I think I'm going to research some more colleges and drink some water (I'm absolutely parched)!

= )

Soul

Life without friends

Hi Everyone!

I'm Currently listening to Jolene by Dolly Parton.

I have amazing friends. I truly think I am blessed with the great fortune of having wonderful caring people around me. I personally love LOVE LOVE my dear friends. My friends have the greatest sense of humor. I need laughter around me constantly. If you know me, which you probably don't, you would know that thirty minutes does not go by without laughter. I want to send a shoutout to my friends who are just so amazing. I love them. I know that you might think it's silly to send a shoutout on a blog that I don't tell any of them about, but it's my little way to appreciate them.

Oh, and my chem teacher is crazy, literally crazy. I don't want to go into the details of what my (and every person's) problems are, but I would just like to put out there that some people should not become teachers. She happens to be one of them. I can't wait for school to be over so I can forget about her and never deal with her EVER again. Anyways, that seems sort of vicious and I promise I don't feel that way towards ANYONE else! She just blows my nuggets...

= )

Soul

Nothing really new...

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Time after Time by Quietdrive

American Idol is on tonight and I'm excited because it's american idol, but I'm not so excited for the theme tonight. It's songs of Andrew Lloyd Weber. I hope Carly and David Cook rock it.

School is still the pain of my life. It is so frustrating. It just compounds on my life and the fact that I never do anything right. I have been trying to just get through it all but it seems like the smallest things annoy me these days. I have junioritis.

= )

Soul

Mish Mosh

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Who Knew by P!nk (Does she still have the exclamation point or is it just an "i" now?)

Sorry for not writing in such a long time. I have been busy with the junior year coursework. It is definitely killing me. I am pulling my hair out. Actually currently I should be revising an essay and writing a chem report. No thanks...

Enough about that subject though. I went to work on Friday and had such a great time. I had talked to Cabbage. He is sooo much fun. I really like him and am going to be really sad when he leaves.

School is crazy, but the book is going well. If I wasn't so tired all the time it would be much further.

Well, off to do that schoolwork...

= )

Soul

New IPOD!!!

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to (There's Gotta Be) More to Life by Stacie Orrico

I am so excited, I just bought a new IPOD. I had the first generation 4 gig nano and was getting a little tired of it. It didn't hold all my songs and that alone was annoying. Also, I have plenty of funny videos that I have made with friends (and by myself) that I would like to watch and can't. SO, I just purchased the 80 gig classic IPOD. It is GORGEOUS! I am syncing it up as I write. Of course it is taking a while because I have at least 20 gigs of music/video/podcasts. I'm fine with the time it takes though. My mom is happy as well because she gets my old 4 gig.

School tomorrow. I am getting used to the horrid junior year, = ). It really is awful, but my only strand of hope is the fact that I only have a couple more months than I am DONE! Senior year is going to be sooo much fun. I am taking an AP English class on top of two other english classes, but since english is my focus I figure it'll be fun. I have heard a lot of good things about the AP English teacher I will have next year. I don't know how he will top my current AP english teacher though. My current teacher has this AMAZING voice. He has the voice you want your dad to have. That raspy strong manly voice. It's perfect to listen to for stories, lectures, etc.

= )

Soul

Writing

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Sensitive Subject Matter by Bonnie McKee

This is pretty much a once in a lifetime thing, three posts in one day. But I'm in a blog-y kind of mood. And I'm excited to have this outlet as well. I am trying to write my story. I have (almost) 3000 words written. I write as much as I can however often I can, but that's rarely. I already know I'm hitting the sack in twenty minutes or so. Which means I really should be writing my story and not my blog. = P. ANYWAYS!

Writing is such a nice outlet. I recommend everyone tries it. Even if you write horribly, it is a good way to let out emotion and get the creative juices flowing. I started my story in a creative writing class and have continued every time I'm finished a little early in that class along with any spare time I have. Which of course I have none, but hey, who knows, maybe over the summer my time will be more free. And everyone tells me senior year is easier than junior year. Heck, every year is better than junior year. I love school, I adore school, but I hate certain things about junior year. Especially two of my classes. All of my other classes are just peachy, but two of them are complete TORTURE!

Well, good night for tonight (I promise)

= )

Soul