Whoa, Judge much?

Hi Everyone!

I'm currently listening to Secret Crowds by Angels and Airwaves.

Okay, a three things to talk about, Stone (of course), Manhattan, and Puck.

Let's start out with the easy (?) stuff first, Stone. So, the past couple of times that I have had to work in groups in the class that Stone is in, he has worked with me. Or when one day when we were a different room and a group of his friends (he knows them and talks to them and they do a certain extra curricular activity with him, I don't know if they are great friends, but friends yes...) were sitting on the other side of the room than me, there was two open chairs by them and one by me, and he sat by ME!!! Then he always is my partner. I don't know if that is because I sit behind him and it is a convenience thing, or if he likes working with me.

Here's my thought, if he didn't like working with me, he could work with someone else close to him, RIGHT???!!!????!!?!!?? AHHGGGRRRHHHH. I am not reading into anything. Mostly because I know nothing will ever come of this. I need to keep telling myself this, because I have been devastated before, just because my feelings get involved in stupid things. Things that will never work out. Why oh why am I so cursed with these feelings?

I find myself thinking about him though. It scares me. Really scares me.

Okay, change of subject. How about another boy? Okay, so Puck and I sit next to each other (in a different class) and (Noodles' class) Noodles thinks that I like him. I would definitely date him because he is really funny and sweet, and all that jazz. How can I have these two feelings? Although I will say, I think about Puck when I am around Puck. When I am not around anyone, I think about Stone.

Noodles is so great though. I hope to do some travelling with her over the summer. She is the BEST teacher I have ever had the pleasure of learning from. She is a great person too.

Okay, now the big stuff... Manhattan. Manhattan and I have been doing great. She is definitely a big part of my life. I was talking to Noodles this morning about thinking of going to a two year college then transferring. I have many reasons for considering this. However, there is a certain expectation from people around me that I will go to a four year school. There is a certain stigma that going to a two year college gets. Which is sort of funny because one of the smartest economic decisions that you can make is to go to a two year college and transfer. ANYWAYS, I have many reasons for considering this, not to mention my two other best friends, also two of the smartest people I know, are going to a two year school first.

So back to the story, I was telling Noodles all of this and talking to her about it because I really wanted to get an outsider's opinion on it all. Well, about twenty minutes later Manhattan comes in and we were talking about something else. However, Manhattan asked about one of my friends and why I was seeing her because she is supposed to be at college. Noodles informed Manhattan that my friend had decided that the four year college that she was planning on going to didn't fit so (before she even started) she decided to go to a local two year school.

Manhattan went off, saying how she thought that my friend was smart so why was she at that two year school, and how her parents would kill her if she even thought the name of the school. I wanted to yell at her. I mean, yeah, some people go there because they can't get in other places, but hey, they are at least going to school. It's not only there for that purpose though. Noodles was shocked at how judgemental Manhattan was about it. Noodles didn't say anything about the conversation we just had, and neither did I. It was just really sucky.

=/

Soul