Hot.

Sometimes I take showers that burn my skin. My skin turns this deep red. It looks like my whole body is blushing. I take these showers once a week... sometimes twice. I have learned that I shouldn't take these showers two days in a row. They make me feel lightheaded. I wasn't thinking and took two, one last night and one today. Less than 24 hours in between. I feel lightheaded.

I like the sensation. I like the slight burn. The thought that goes screaming through my head to either get out of the scalding water or to turn it down. I fight this urge and take the burn. I usually do this when I need to think. When something stressful is going on as well...

I feel so lightheaded. I feel sick.

I don't know what to do...

I was bad...

But so was he.